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"You are nothing but a loser Mike. You have no prospects for ever being better than you are right now; you are boring as hell and you are not worth a shit in bed. I see no earthly reason for staying with you."The divorce cost me everything that I had and for a year I walked around feeling sorry for myself and becoming a drunk. During that year she remarried and her new husband was one of the upwardly mobile yuppies who was making a name for himself in business and social circles. During that same year my best friend George decided to do something for me that I didn't seem to want to do for myself. He forced me to come back to the living; made me by the force of his will, not mine, give up drinking and go back to having a life.I did however get the last laugh where Brenda was concerned. In an ironic twist of fate the woman who left me for someone else who could give her all the material things she wanted got to pick up the paper one morning and read about her ex-husband winning 17.6. Do you know what anorchiectomy is?" Sort of" I say, but I'm beginning to suspect where this conversationis going, "I read about it in one of my magazines, 'Cosmopolitan' Ithink. Isn't that an operation where they cut a man's balls off?" Well, yes," says Lady. "But in this case I think it's fair to saythat they'll cut a lady's balls off. Listen closely now."She turned to my hubby, and walked around to look him full in the face,and motioned to me to stand alongside her. And she motioned for me tostand with my legs a little apart, and hands on hips, same as her."Muffin dear," she said. "Now, stay seated in your chair. You don'tneed to answer us on your knees this time. But answer very clearlyeach question I ask you, and then answer your wife. If she's notsatisfied, then nothing's going to happen. Now, first, do you want tobe a girl for the rest of your life?" Yes," my little hubby replied. "Yes, my lady. Yes. Please." Do you feel in your heart that you are already a girl.".
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